1. The Wall Street Journal is read by the people who run the country.

2. The New York Times is read by people who think they run the country.

3. The Washington Post is read by people who think they should run the country.

4. USA Today is read by people who think they ought to run the country
but don’t really understand the Washington Post. They do, however, like
the smog statistics shown in pie charts.

5. The Los Angeles Times is read by people who wouldn’t mind running
the country, if they could spare the time, and if they didn’t have to
leave L.A. to do it.

6. The Boston Globe is read by people whose parents used to run the country.

7. The New York Daily News is read by people who aren’t too sure who’s
running the country, and don’t really care as long as they can get a
seat on the train.

8. The New York Post is read by people who don’t care who’s running
the country either, as long as they do something really scandalous,
preferably while intoxicated.

9. The San Francisco Chronicle is read by people who aren’t sure there
is a country, or that anyone is running it; but whoever it is, they
oppose all that they stand for. There are occasional exceptions if the
leaders are handicapped minority, feministic atheist dwarfs, who also
happen to be illegal aliens from ANY country or galaxy as long as they
are democrats.

10. The Miami Herald is read by people who are running another
country, but need the baseball scores.
and last but not least:

11. The Onion is read by people who should be running the country.

Advertisements