Here is the recipe for Martin’s Cool Mocha (cool in temperature, not so sure about its “hipness” factor).



You’ll need:


An espresso machine (I use a crappy but sturdy Hamilton Beach one I bought for US$60 from Target)


Organic espresso—either Coloiera from any JJ Bean location or Origins Medium from Café Petit Ami on Granville Island (either way, I think they use the same grinder, so ask for Grind Setting #2 and ignore all other questions they ask about what kind of machine you got… number 2 is number 2 is number 2)


Lactose-free milk, 2% (such as Safeway’s Lucerne or Parmalat’s LactAid)


Two Lindt D’Or chocolate spheres (as dark a kind as you can stand) or roughly as much of a quantity of chocolate chips as of espresso powder.  I am currently trying out Callebaut chocolate chips, and though they don’t have the coconut oil (the secret sauce in Lindt D’Or), they also don’t have all that weird emulsifier crap.




You should:


Make two shots of espresso.

Pour the espresso shots over the two chocolate spheres.

Mix until the chocolate’s dissolved.

Pour cool milk in to taste.







i looked at my wallet and said, yeah, i have enough here for milk and celery and a loaf of bread. went to greenstar, got milk and celery.

every time i’m there, the super tall, kinda-nerdy, kinda-cute woman is working there, she’s like those eyes on paintings–not really following you around, but following you around nonetheless. then she automagically appeared to bag my groceries. she was cute, but i suddenly realized how hard it would be to live without L’s freckles, if ever i had to. it would be the most terrible thing. it’d be like having to swear off cinnamon for ever. actually probably worse, since i’m not addicted to cinnamon enough that i have to experience it every day.

anyway, back to the wallet story. after that i went to ithaca bakery, passed by the less highly-priced breads and went straight for the 3-seed. you know, the one that tends toward phallicity:

nsfw bread from ithaca bakery 1

clearly my intention was to smear/honour Int’l Women’s Day. clearly.

the bread was almost 4 bucks. i let the very attractive and stylish mom with a baby on her arm in front of me know that her wallet was virtually, literally, pretty much falling out of her jacket.

i pull out my wallet to pay, and there are only three greenbacks in it. i’m like, Self, there better be some change in the coin purse part. there barely is, but still not enough for $3.95 that the guy behind the counter quotes me. i say: “this isn’t going to work, i’m going to have to get a less expensive bread, what’s in my hand is not 95 cents”. to which he replies: “oh wait, it’s actually $3.75, how much do you have in your hand?”

i had 76 cents.

currently enjoying two 3-seed sandwiches with honey, butter, and the closest thing that Wegmans has to Polish twaróg—Bellweather Farms’ Fromage Blanc aka Farmer’s Cheese (less runny and less sweet than ricotta):

essentially twarog

chased down by a lactose-free iced mocha made with JJBean’s Coloiera espresso grind and two Lindt Truffles milk-chocolate “death stars”, of course:

Death Star 2